REMEMBERING WHO AND WHOSE I AM

--Efrem K. Bryant

So much comes to my mind in difficult/uncertain times like we’re experiencing as a nation—and worldwide. How we get through it is something we are all grasping with. Especially those in my generation. Personally, we will all have to analyze what’s going on and make some important decisions and adjustments for our own well-being. The best advice I was given—from childhood—still rings in my mind and spirit. And it’s my reliable “go to” for all decisions and problems I face: “REMEMBER WHO AND WHOSE YOU ARE”. It’s the deep, guiding, spiritual advice—a phrase taught to me and my siblings by my mother. Somehow, even as a young kid, just hearing that phrase empowered me, made me feel strong and confident. It made me know there was something special about me, and throughout the years, I have had to constantly lay claim to it, no matter what situations I faced.

But knowing the truth of that phrase was not just something taught in words, it was demonstrated. And parents and others overseeing the welfare of young people must intentionally demonstrate the truth of that phrase so that younger people will truly “get it”. That is a much-needed mantra in these despicable times, when we simply don’t always know what to do. It’s not just something you say without intentionality. A child will understand and accept it more readily by actually observing the adult in charge demonstrate it. Unfortunately, there’s not always enough adult demonstration of the BEST of who and whose we are. As a result, we’re seeing and experiencing the current not-so-healthy state of our world.

Being our best is a personal thing. And my personal advice to us all is to Pray. Every day. At the start of the day—when we wake up—and throughout our day. There are many negative situations we could avoid if we did that: pray and listen for divine guidance and then obey; although only God’s grace can spare us from some situations. Nevertheless, we must do our part; the part we know to do. We have other personal obligations, too, that can help us as we walk through troubled waters of the current world and our life in general. Sometimes we just need to let our body/temple settle so that we can hear clearly from our truest Guide on what our next steps should be. Rest and naps are my personal “go to” – especially in times of trouble and/or indecision. In times of uncertainty and indecision, my best actions and motto direct me to: Find a Quiet Space. Get Quiet. Get Patient. Get Grateful. I also believe it’s important to read worthwhile books. For me, it’s listening to and/or reading my favorite book, Conversations With God. But ,it’s important to find something immediately to be grateful for—big or small; the smaller the better sometimes.

Despite the intrusion of chaos, I think it helps to reset our perspective so that we can notice all the little things for deeper appreciation. I greatly appreciate the work I do as a mental health professional. Just helping others resolve their issues can be personally helpful and rewarding. I earned my MSW from USC with highest aims of helping others through tough times, and I believe my degree was worth the time and personal financial struggle. Nevertheless, I often wonder whether I would have gotten to the same places with the same access had I not gained my degree from what’s considered a prestigious university. Would it have mattered had I gone to a predominantly Black university? Despite the many uncertainties of life and things that pose potential problems, determination, faith, self-education and self-care through a spiritual foundation and understanding rate high with me. And thankfully, I’ve learned this from the best teacher in my life: my mom. Her constant advice and reminder was, “REMEMBER WHO AND WHOSE YOU ARE.” I understood it and took that advice which grounded, guided, and protected me. I believed what she said throughout those years, and I still do. Thanks, mom!